The folks over at The Source for Youth Ministry have created a helpful guide to "teen lingo".

Inspired by this, and armed with the understanding that many people have difficulty understanding the references to all things in pop-mirrorshades culture, I have taken the liberty of preparing a mirrorshades-oriented lexicon, which will probably not be in the least bit helpful unless you already know what it means.

Thanks goes out to Dan for his assistance.

AD 2101 (n.) A sign of impending doom. "Shit, I think I just failed my math test. It's AD 2101, dawg."

all your base (n.) To flaunt large sums of money. "Man, did you see Billy's new Mercedes?" "Yeah. All your base are belong to him."

arrow (v.) To distract from a situation by diverting attention to a less meaningful topic. "Dawg, you theivin' my ice?" "Shoot no, did you see the movie last night?" "Don't be arrowin' me now!"

bretarded (adj.) 1. Overwhelmingly inane. "Man, Rick was making no sense back there. He's totally bretarded."
2. (n.) A person who makes an error while typing. "Haha, he just made a typo! What a bretard!"

Bryan's pants (n.) The condition of being conspicuously absent. "Jason wasn't in class today, he must have been Bryan's pants."

CNN.com POLL (n.) Something that makes no sense whatsoever. "You be trippin'! I stared at this algebra problem for five hours but it's CNN.com POLL."

cloud (n.) A myth or legend. "Hey, I heard the house over on 49th is haunted!" "Aw shit, dawg, that's just The Cloud."

Galstaff (n.) To be "straight edge", to not use drugs or drink. "Hey Billy, you want some of this dank?" "No, I am Galstaff, sorceror of light!" "Then how come last week you cast Magic Missile?"

gay belt (adj.) Disastrously uncool, as in fashion. "Check out Marcus' New Balance. Dat shit's so gay belt."

goats with boats (adj.) To be disgusting or unpleasant, as in design. "They painted the pool room green. It's totally goats with boats."

graphic novel (n.) Something that should not be discussed. "Hey, I scored some great weed for tonight." "Shhh! The teacher is right there! That's a graphic novel, yo!"

honeybunch sugarplum pumpy-umpy-umpkin (n.) A close friend. "You're my honeybunch sugarplum pumpy-umpy-umpkin. You're my sweetie pie!"

Jerry Seinfeld (n.) A clumsy fool. "Did you hear what Bret said earlier? Dat nigga be Jerry Seinfeld!"

justin (n.) Someone who lives under a bed. "Hi Justin." SEE ALSO: James, Jarvis, Jeeves, Jehosephat, Jim, Joseph, Jerry, John, Jason, Jim, Jackson, Johnson, Jordan, Jake, Jehovah, Jean-Claude, Jean-Luc, Jesus, Jaymes...

Luke Skywalker (n.) To be unlucky with the opposite gender. "I went to da club, but I didn't get any friends. I'm Luke Skywalker."

Mac (v.) To spend far more than something is worth; to get ripped off. "You paid three hundred dollars for that gay belt? You got Macced."

mackle (v.) To do something obviously dangerous and/or stupid which results in severe injury or death. "Last night my boy Jeff played Russian Roulette with an automatic. He totally mackled."

main screen turn on (n.) To express approval or affirmation. "You wanna check out my phat ride?" "Main screen turn on!"

magic missle (n.) Narcotic pills such as qualludes or tranquilizers. "I am though, if you'd listen. I wanna cast Magic Missle."

molly (adj.) Deceptively deadly. "Mah boy Tommy might look small, but he's molly when he in trouble."

Mordenkannen's Magical Watchdog (n.) A group of friends, often used as a threat. "Shoot, you messin' with my chassy? I should straight up clock your grill!" "How can you do that? I have Mordenkannen's Faithful Watchdog!"

move zig (v.) To strike back, as in defense. "I'll bust yo' grill fo' that!" "Yo dawg, you touch me an' I be movin' zig!"

nevertrustamonkey (n.) The worst condition imaginable. "Y'all see Cindy's new ride? That shit's like nevertrustamonkey."

official (adj.) Official. "It's OFFICIAL."

optical drive (n.) The most desirable features, often leading to a superior experience. "Shit, dawg! Check out dat ho! She got da optical drive!"

plus nine (adj.) An advantage, especially from a possession, for dealing with a certain situation. "Oh shit, the 5 0 is coming!" "5 0? Man, I got a 5 0-slaying gat! It's got a plus nine against 5 0!"

*POP* (n.) The condition of being entirely unhelpful. "I was tryin' to do my project with Heather but she was all like *POP*."

seg (n.) To leave in a hurry. "The po po is comin'! Let's seg!"

stevers (n.) A condition by which one is always at a bad angle, as in basketball or photography. "I thought I was gonna make that three-pointer but I got stevers."

triad (n.) Giving a false impression of value through elaborate obfuscation. "She act like she blingin', but I know Missy's triad."

the controller (n.) The person in charge of a group or situation. "If you give Eric some grain, he get hook you up with mad 40s. Dat nigga's The Controller."

the creeping doom (n.) A person of a disreputable or hostile attitude. "I can't beleive our teacher gave us that paper over da weekend, yo. She totally be the Creeping Doom."

two Jesuses (n.) A difficult task. "Did you get that essay done yet?" "Yeah, but I had to use two Jesuses for that."

Vince Neil (n.) SEE Jerry Seinfeld.

with you always (adj.) To be a concerned friend or savior of man. SEE ALSO: got your back. "Don't worry, dawg. I'm with you always."

you're the man now dawg (n.) An expression of approval for someone's actions. "You're the man now dawg! You're the man now dawg! You're the man now dawg! You're the man now dawg! You're the man now dawg! You're the man now dawg!"

zee german (n.) The only one in a group that has some sense. "Shit dawg, that's a good idea. You must be zee german."

ZebrowitzX8000 (n.) (abbr. ZX8k) A high-quality electronic device, usually a stereo. "Did you see Billy's new system? It's totally ZX8k!".