"That which is overdesigned, too highly specific, anticipates outcome; the anticipation of outcome guarantees, if not failure, the absence of grace."
-- William Gibson, All Tomorrow's Parties
Reception and after-party.

Pete and I headed down to the restaurant a few minutes early, got seated, and sat around watching all the crazy stuff going on. Sophy and Adam were pinning flowers on people as they came in, there were many people taking pictures, kids were running around. It was pretty chaotic.

There was much fooding, twelve courses in all, most of which was seafood, so I didn't eat a whole lot. A chicken came out with its head still attached, and Jason (asm) made a disturbing little sculpture out of it.

A full fish, empty inside, but with all sorts of stuff baked onto it and cherry eyes came out. Adam's little brother Dane walked up to our table, saw the fish, and made a face that caused me to laugh for a good two minutes.

Pete is completely enamored, to put it politely, with Cambodian/Asian women now.

The band was painfully loud, Cambodians do this thing that looks like Hawaiian hula dancing (the thing with the hands), but only in lines. Hula line dancing. Or in circles. Watching a bunch of Italians do this was completely hilarious. Watching Cambodians boogy down while Italians dance around with mad American style through their lines was also pretty awesome.

Adam's brother Scott gave a toast which was completely offensive, and pretty entertaining. He kept skipping pages, which he later came back and read to us. I didn't get a chance to give my toast at the reception, as there wasn't really any time between all the incredibly loud music, dancing, eating, and finally the cake cutting and boquet throwing.

All in all, I think it was exceedingly cool. Sophy looked amazing in her wedding dress.

After the reception, we all managed to get over to Adam's to sit around for four hours for drinking and laughing. It was pretty fucking awesome. I smoked way too many cigarettes with Eric.

Adam busted out the champagne (which was astoundingly awful, I gave my glass to Nick who, while a trooper and drank it, was making Faces the entire time), and I gave my toast. There were many interruptions, those bastards, but I think it was received well. The text follows. Unfortunately for Michelle I didn't manage to record it, which is a pity, because the comments while I was giving it were very entertaining.

First, I'd like to thank Adam for bestowing upon me the privilege of carrying a chicken in yesterday's dowry parade. It was very exciting. And heavy. Unfortunately, my fellow chicken-bearer couldn't be in attendance tonight.

I've known Adam and Sophy for a few years now. Adam and I have seen each other in good and bad times, some of which involved handguns or too far much alcohol, but luckily never both at the same time, and I'm proud to have witnessed the last couple days. As a career bachelor, I'm sure I only know a fraction of the trials and tribulations they've faced to get to this point; the dragons slain, the mountains moved, the rivers re-routed. And here they are, through the rings of fire and over the pits filled with Kevlar-adorned venomous monkeys.

I'm incredibly proud of both of them.

Now... THAT said, Adam can be absolutely intolerable at times. Anyone here who knows me knows that I am a man of infinite patience, but somehow Adam has the singular facility of pissing me off at the drop of a hat. He can be pedantic, long-winded, disgusting, overly detailed, and needlessly perverse. And when he gets VERY drunk, he gives incredibly awful advice -- like telling his poor drunk friend he should go home with a 40 year old woman -- or tries to pay people to throw potato salad at other people. Which I, as an Irishman, find morally repugnant.

Sophy is OBVIOUSLY an angel.

However, there is a thread of decency that binds Adam together, and resonates with a similar thread in Sophy. Something that pulls them together, strengthens them, and drives them to better themselves as human beings, for themselves and for each other. The last few days have been, if nothing else, a testament to the strength of that bond.

And it's that thread, that will to be a better man, that requires me to consider Adam a worthwhile human being and a good friend despite hearing the same poop jokes dozens of times.

There should be something here about a successful marriage, or something, blah blah blah.

And so, Adam, Sophy, may your marriage age like a fine wine: May you gain clarity, and may you spend plenty of time horizontal.

Got home around 0345, and now I'm going to read for a little while, try to ignore the cigarette smell on my hands, and then sleep for a day or two.

September 6, 2004 4:18 AM